I can’t believe that this
could be is my last blog post before my new little bundle enters the world. I went in for a doctor’s appointment today at 40 weeks, 2 days, and we found out that my cervix is ready and that I’m a good candidate for induction. I wanted to wait and see if the labor would start naturally, but Dan’s parents are coming into town and leaving on Monday (which is when the Dr. would recommend that I induce at the latest) and since my cervix is ready, that coupled with the inlaw’s visit is what I based my decision on. I’m trying not to feel guilty about it or over-analyz it. I’ve already received some comments that have rubbed me the wrong way. I know everyone has their opinions on inductions, but its a personal decision and I feel that we’re making the right one. If my cervix wasn’t ready for it, and if I wasn’t past my due date, then it wouldn’t be a good option for me. I talked about this some here.
Parker will be staying with his buddy Campen and parents Ben and Gracile while we’re in the hospital. Campen and Parker have had many playdates and are only three weeks apart in age. I know he’s going to have a blast over there with his buddy, playing with all his toys and charming his way into special treatments. We are so very thankful to Ben and Gracile for helping us with this! Lizzie (our sheltie-shepard rescue pup)will be staying with her new boyfriend Dawson, (which ironically is the name of one of my OB doctors) at Aunt Danielle’s house. She’ll be well taken care of and have a fun playmate that has a huge back yard for her to roam free and chase squirrels. See what great parents we are?
My Grandmother and Dan were both in the delivery room when Parker was born, and it was great to have both of them to encourage me and help comfort me. This time, my Mom and Dan will be in the room for Mason’s delivery, and I’m excited that she will be able to experience this with us.
It is in fact, all a little bitter sweet. We’re so prepared with everything that Mason will need right when he comes home. The diapers and clothes are washed, drawers and baskets stocked, the fully charged batteries are in the bouncy seat and swings, preparations are made for Parker and our hospital bags are packed. I’m a planner, so there wasn’t a doubt that I would have all my ducks in a row way before it was time. I haven’t however, seemed to prepare myself emotionally for a new baby. I mean, Parker is my baby. RIGHT? Didn’t I JUST bring him home from the hospital? I’m tearing up as I type…. How can I possibly love another little baby boy as much as I love my sweet Parker? I KNOW I will. I just know it, but it’s really hard for me to grasp, if I’m being perfectly honest. I have this gut wrenching feeling that I’m not going to be able to give Parker the love and attention that he deserves with another baby around. That really works at my insides. I’ve really been enjoying his fun little personality lately too. He always finds a way to make me and his daddy smile. He’s saying new words. He randomly blows me kisses. He does this thing with fingers and strums his lips like a guitar while he laughs. His happiness is so contagious. I’ve heard that God will make your love multiply when you have kids, and I’m just trusting that is the case. If God has enough love to share with all of his children, then I am confident that he will equip me with what I need to be a good loving mother to both of my boys. I’m apprehensive…yet very excited about this new chapter in our life. A life that includes my little family of four. I wouldn’t ask for it any other way.